Loretta Lynn was a highly public country music superstar. Outside the limelight, however, she shouldered many professional and personal burdens. And when she unexpectedly lost her eldest son, it led to what Lynn described as divine intervention.
Loretta Lynn went from cleaning houses to selling over 45 million records worldwide while being a mother to 6 kids as well as a loving wife. The road was long, and she said it often turned “from misery to happiness — and sometimes back to misery.”
Even though Loretta reached great success through her music, it’s a path she felt she had to take for the sake of her family. It was a double-edged sword, since her success in music meant her family was being properly provided for. But at the same time, it took her away from them for long periods, until death sadly took not one, but two family members out of her life permanently.
Loretta Lynn attends the 47th Annual Grammy Awards | Source: Getty Images
Making Ends Meet
Loretta mourned the loss of two children. She lost a daughter through sickness and a son unexpectedly as a result of a tragic turn of events. She became a mother to six children in total, with the first four already born by the time she cut her first record, “I’m a Honky Tonk Girl,” in 1960.
It was a make-or-break time for Loretta. She’d already been married to Oliver “Mooney” Lynn for 12 years. And on his meager salary as a mechanic, along with her earnings from cleaning houses and their expanding family, they were not getting by.
Loretta Lynn and her husband Oliver “Mooney” Lynn, at the Country & Western Music Awards, Hollywood, California, February 27, 1975 | Source: Getty Images
The Cost of Reaching for Fame
At Oliver’s encouragement, and with him largely in control of Loretta’s career, the family up and moved from Washington state to Nashville so she could pursue a singing career in earnest. And it paid off. Loretta made her first appearance at Music City’s Grand Ole Opry on October 15, 1960. But her quickly mounting success came at a cost.
Her career skyrocketing meant Loretta spent a lot of time away from her young family — a price that had long-lasting consequences on her life. “You never catch up the lost time. That time’s gone,” she said.
Loretta Lynn poses for a portrait holding a guitar circa 1961 in Nashville, Tennessee | Source: Getty Images
It wasn’t unusual for Loretta to miss special occasions, holidays, or normal family time, which made touring “rough” for her. Loretta’s first four kids, Betty Sue, Jack Benny, Clara Marie, and Ernest Ray, all came into the world before Loretta reached fame, so she went from spending hours a day to hardly any time with them at all, and it took a toll on her.
“I was working clubs, and I was doing like three and four shows a night,” Loretta recalled. Even while pregnant with twins Patsy Eileen and Peggy Jean (born in 1964) the country singer didn’t let up on her busy schedule. “I’d play shows right up until the babies was born and that guitar around my neck just about killed me. I don’t advise it to any mother,” she added.
Divine Intervention
Everything Loretta did was for her family. “Family means everything to me,” she said. And it’s because of Loretta’s love for and devotion to her family and their well-being that the unexpected loss of her eldest son had had enough of an impact on her that she said it led to an intervention by God.
At the time of his death, Loretta came down with an illness the media labeled as exhaustion, but she reportedly set the record straight later on by clarifying that she had suffered a seizure. “I think the seizure was God’s way of saying he’s helping me. He’s really not letting my mind cope with it yet,” she said.
Loretta Lynn in Los Angeles, California on October 21, 1989 | Source: Getty Images
The Death of Loretta’s Son
In July 1984, Jack Benny, the child Loretta said in her autobiography she felt “most sentimental about,” died from a tragic drowning incident.
Loretta and Jack Benny shared a close bond. As Loretta’s one daughter recalled, “They were very close. It was probably because he took after my dad.”
Jack Benny was riding his quarter horse, Black Jack, on the family’s 5,000-acre ranch, Hurricane Mills, in Tennessee, when he drowned about 4 miles from where he lived with his wife, Barbara.
The 34-year-old was trying to ford the treacherous Duck River on horseback when the incident occurred, and Black Jack was later found unharmed but trapped along the river bank. Even though Loretta wasn’t immediately informed, she initially took the devastating news better than expected, but that soon crumbled.
How Loretta Handled Her Son’s Death
According to the singer’s daughter Patsy, “she tore all to pieces” before they put her on a chartered flight to Nashville, where she would stay in a hospital until Jack Benny’s funeral.
Jack Benny Lynn on July 25, 1984, in Waverly, Tennessee | Source: Getty Images
When the day arrived, over 300 mourners gathered at the Luff-Bowen funeral home in Waverly while a tape played Willie Nelson’s “Uncloudy Day” and “Amazing Grace.” While Loretta wept quietly during the service and the ride to their family burial plot at Hurricane Mills, she lost all composure as the casket was about to be lowered into the ground.
Loretta started sobbing uncontrollably and had to be supported and helped back to the car after her knees buckled. “It’s finally started to hit her,” her manager, David Skepner, noted.
Country music queen Loretta Lynn, center, is assisted by her husband, Mooney, on July 27, 1984, in Waverly, Tennesseeas, as they leave the funeral of their son | Source: Getty Images
Loretta Faced the Death of Another Child
Loretta’s first-born daughter, Betty Sue, acknowledged that life wouldn’t be the same without her brother. Sadly, the family would have to deal with also losing Betty Sue in 2013.
A few months before Loretta’s death in October 2022, she paid tribute to Betty Sue and Jack Benny in separate posts on social media.
Loretta’s Tributes to Her Lost Children Shortly before Her Death
Alongside a carousel of images featuring Betty Sue, Loretta took a trip down memory lane. “We talked on the phone every day and saw each other a lot when I was home off the road. It felt like part of my heart died when she left us. I hated seeing her sick, but I didn’t want to let her go. She was more than a daughter; she was a best friend,” she wrote.
While Betty Sue was 63 when she passed, it didn’t lessen the grief it caused Loretta. “Young or old, no parent should ever have to bury a child. I’ve buried two of mine and there’s no pain like it,” she lamented.
Loretta’s tribute to Jack Benny a few days earlier consisted of throwback images and a short caption, “Today is 38 years without my Jack.” Three months after Loretta’s posts, she passed away as well.
In a statement, her family shared that she had died at her Hurricane Mills home in her sleep. She was 90.
While Loretta Lynn will always be remembered for her illustrious career, including the story about her life, “Coal Miner’s Daughter,” her devotion to family and community also left an indelible mark on her legacy. Though she had a life filled with major gains and losses, she never stopped giving, and she never gave up.
